I’ve never had the random desire to jump up and go get a tattoo
But I do right now
I can’t afford it
But I want to
Why am I awake who summoned me
Maybe that means your soul mate is thinking about you
My soul mate needs to go the fuck to sleep
MY MOM HAS THIS NASTY THING WITH HER EYES, RIGHT.
WELL ANYWAY, SHE HAD EYEDROPS.
BUT THEY GAVE HER EYE AN ALLERGIC REACTION.
AND IT CAUSED HER EYE TO GLOW IN THE DARK.
AND SHE SAYS SHE ACTUALLY HAD GREEN/PURPLE NIGHT VISION.
MY MOM’S COOLER THAN YOURS, DOES UR MUM HAVE NIGHT VISION? NO? DIDN’T THINK SO.
This could be the weirdest superhero origin story.
why are there no knock-knock jokes about freedom
because freedom rings
stop unfollowing me